♥ Heart Check-up 2010♥

Landon was born with a congenital heart defect called Tetralogy of Fallot. It is explained here as simply as it can be. I was lucky, I guess you could say. I found out about Landon's defect when I was pregnant. Most of the time it isn't noticed until the baby is born. A severe murmur is heard during the newborn checkup and the baby is wisked off to a children's hospital for immediate surgery before the parents even know what happened. I was at least prepared it was possible. Thankfully, after a few preterm labor scares, Landon was born full term and his heart was strong enough and functioning well enough to come home with me so he could grow and get even stronger before having surgery. A baby's heart is only about the size of his or her fist. Can you imagine what it must be like to operate on a heart that tiny? It baffles

my mind to this day.

Landon was born December 28th and we scheduled his surgery for May 15th. At the beginning of April I had some medical issues and had to take a medication that didn't allow me to continue to breastfeed. I slowly weaned Landon to formula. When he was completely switched over he started reacting to the lactose in the formula. He would get a tummy ache and have terrible crying fits. They progressively got worse and Landon started having tet spells (cyanotic episodes). Landon's cardiologist told us this might happen from time to time so I didn't immediately worry but it was still very scary to see when it happened. As the spells occurred more often and got worse I decided to call his doctor to be reassured he wasn't in danger. She asked me to bring him in which resulted in an ambulance ride to Wisconsin Children's Hospital in Milwaukee after he had a tet spell in her office. We got there on Friday. He had surgery on Monday morning and much to my amazement was discharged Friday of the same week. To repair Landon's heart they took a piece of the sack around his heart and used it to patch the hole between his chambers. They used gore-tex to replace what they took from his pericardial sack. They also made his pulmonary valve bigger. Unfortunately, by changing the valve it caused the valve to leak. In this situation, after the right ventricle pumps blood to the pulmonary artery some of the blood is able to flow backwards through that valve. This causes extra volume in the right ventricle and makes the heart work harder to pump it back out. Because exercise makes muscles bigger this kind of extra work cause the ventricle to become enlarged and pump inefficiently. Landon's cardiologist keeps an eye on that valve through yearly checkups like he had today.

First he had an EKG. Landon is very ticklish which makes putting the electrode stickers on lots of fun.

Then he had a chest x-ray. He was not impressed with all this doctor stuff.

And finally we seen his pediatric cardiologist, Dr. Finta.



She went over the results of the EKG and x-ray and she listened to Landon's heart. With her well tuned ears she can hear how well that patch is working and how much his valve is leaking. She told us Landon's valve is more noisy than it was last year and she thinks Landon will probably need to have his valve replaced sooner than we thought. He isn't in any immediate danger but it is deteriorating faster than she expected it would. We were hoping to make it til he was 16 to 18 years old. For now she is going to keep a close eye on it. She moved up his echo cardiogram that is usually done every 3 years. We just did one last year and he'll have another next year. At home we just have to keep an eye out that he's doesn't get worn out or out of breath more often than usual. Hopefully we'll make it at least a few more years before we have to do the surgery. At the moment Landon has no side effects from his leaky valve and is looking forward to getting into trouble as usual.

An Open Poem to my Brother

As I lay here in my bed,

next to where my daughter lays her head.

I can't imagine what our parents go through,

every time they get the call about you.

Does it matter to you at all,

how much it affects us when you fall?

You could have killed those people tonight!

What makes you think you had the right?

Go ahead, blame your wife.

She's no excuse to ruin your life.

Do you remember that machine breathing for you last time?

To erase that fear, still in my heart, I'd give my last dime.

Seeing you in that hospital bed

How close you were to being dead.

Never again is what you swore

Your promises I believe no more.

With another totalled car

Again here you are.

Aren't the rest of us enough

Is the choice really that tough?

Do you even care?

You keep taking that drinker's dare.

I'm scared one day your luck will dry.

We'll be here, left to cry.

To comfort each other,

We'll be without our little brother.

Something's got to give.

I hope you choose to live.

How would I explain the news

to your niece and nephews?

I hope next time you go out

that gives you something to think about.

How can you be so self-centered?

Have those of us you'll leave behind been considered?
You know I didn't write this without cause.

A picture you don't like, I hope for you it draws.

Over She Goes

Danica rolled over for the first time today. She really hates tummy time. I'm sure she'll never stay on her tummy now that she's got it figured out. The first time she did it I thought it was just an accident from rocking a little when she was upset about being on her tummy. I rolled her back over and she did it again and swung her hip into it. Hehe! She's growing so fast!

Judgement and Gossip

"We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows their own pain and and renunciation. It's one thing to feel you are on the right path, but its another to think yours is the only path." Paulo Coelho

"The best ammunition against lies is the truth, there is no ammunition against gossip. It is like a fog and the clear wind blows it away and the sun burns it off." Ernest Hemingway

I was reminded today that I live in a small town where judgement and gossip are the bible and the truth is ignored. People talk to you so they'll have something to gossip and giggle about later. For some reason I feel the need to clear the fog even though I couldn't really care less about what other people think. The only people that do matter to me are my husband, children, and extended family (and not even some of those).

Ryan and I have an old house. VERY old. The people that owned it before us did not take care of it to say the least. I do my best to keep it clean...as clean as it can be for the shape its in. Ryan and I met shortly after he bought the house. He and I have put in a lot of work and effort to get it to where it is now. We've also gotten married and had 2 children in the process of it. Ryan and I plan to rebuild. We've tried a few times but the economy sucks, the housing market is in the gutter, and the banks are conservative as heck. This makes it really hard for us to do anything without a gigantic down payment. So for now we're happily plugging along, paying off the few debts we have, and doing basic maintenance to keep this house livable. Its not an ideal situation but hey...the house is ours. We're not "throwing money away" renting and we have 40 beautiful acres. We're not going to put out $20K to replace the rotted wood siding on the house only to tear it down in 3 years. Instead we'll replace the bad pieces and put a fresh coat of paint on so it doesn't get any worse.

We have a variety of animals here. People poke fun at our "petting zoo" but you know what? My monthly grocery bill is $200 dollars for 5 people. Sometimes its less. My meat is raised all naturally and humanely. My food doesn't have additives and preservatives. Its also much better quality than store bought. My kids are outside helping me with chores. They're learning responsibility, the values of hard work, and having fun at the same time. They're staying fit and healthy too instead of watching tv and playing video games all day.

I use cloth diapers. Not because I can't afford diapers but because 1 child goes through 1 ton of diapers from birth to potty learning and that ton of diapers takes 200-500 years to decompose. I care about what I'm leaving behind for my kids...I sure as heck don't want it to be dirty diapers. Not to mention the chemicals in disposable diapers and how unhealthy they really are. I'm not putting that stuff near my kids sensitive parts unless I have to so I do it as sparingly as possible. I save some money by using cloth diapers but it is very easy to spend considerably more on cloth diapers than you would on disposables in today's cloth diapering market. There are diapers out there that go for $30 each!

I'm a stay at home mom. I had serious issues with putting children in a daycare. I didn't want someone else to take care of and see my kids more than I do. I feel bad for moms who don't have any other option. Ryan also feels that since he can't be home because he drives truck, one parent should be. Before Ryan and I got married I had a full time job that mandated me to work overtime. On the days I had to work extra Landon had to go to daycare. I researched and found one I thought I could trust. The second day Landon was there he caught rotavirus and ended up in the hospital for 3 days. Rotavirus is spread by the ingestion of fecal germs. During that hospital stay Ryan and I both decided I'd quit my job before any of our kids ever had to go to daycare again. Add to that it would cost us more for daycare now that we have 3 chidren than I would actually make working so it doesn't make any sense to begin with.

So in closing *a.k.a. stepping off my soapbox* We don't do the things we do because we have something to prove, because we think it makes us better than anyone else, or because we're poor. We do them because we feel its whats best for ourselves and our kids.

As Montgomery Gentry says. "You do your thing, I'll do mine"

Have you heard the one about the egg?

It isn't all its cracked up to be!

Landon and Sawyer love to help collect eggs. When we get a bucket full every couple of days I soak them all in the sink, wash them, and the boys get to put them in egg cartons for me.

Tonight I decided to make egg salad sandwiches for supper. I boiled the eggs and had them soaking in the sink with cool water so I could peel them. I took Danica in the kids' playroom to change her diaper. The boys were in the bathroom going potty and washing their hands. After Danica was changed I came into the kitchen to find Landon and Sawyer standing on chairs at the sink. They proudly announced "We're washing eggies, Mommy!"

They thought I was washing eggs in the sink and had taken the fresh eggs we had just collected from outside and put them in the sink with the hard boiled eggs. Needless to say peeling eggs was lots of fun.